Turning Points...We all have them!

There come a time in your life when you are at a turning point, a fork in the road and you must make a decision. Do I turn to the left or do I turn to the right? Well, I'm experiencing many turning points these days. I'm just at the beginning of my core clinical rotations, but I feel I need to make decisions now, about which path I desire to take in the near future. My core rotations consist of Family Medicine, Internal Medicine, Psychiarty, Pediatrics, OB/GYN, and Surgery. In these rotations, I am learning the foundations of clinical practice and also determining my desired specialty. The way my schedule is set up, I don't have a lot of time to contemplate this momentous decision, if I would like to successfully match (obtain a residency) in 2016. Match 2016 opens Sept. 2015, and I will just be completing my surgery rotation. Therefore, I must have completed STEP 2 CS, Step 2 CK, re-written my personal statement, updated my CV and have on file at least 3 letters of recommendation for the desire specialty in place and ready to go. Sigh....My school has given me until Feb 2015 to have my personal statement ready and CV updated....So, I will get that done over Christmas break....The dilemna is what speciality do I pursue...So far, I've only completed two: Family Med and Internal Medicine (2 weeks left in rotation). And I have thoroughly loved both...I'm thinking I am the kind of person that really loves anything new and exciting....Am I going to love Peds, Psych, too? Well, my first mind is telling me to pursue Internal Medicine...this field is so vast and wide open. I could go in so many different directions. Internal Medicine started me out in the Emergency Room, which was a BLAST...then outpatient where I learned to dance...Now, I'm in the hospital on ICU floor...learning alot and seeing some really great cases...I think my hospital experience has increased my learning curve expotentially. I just love the doctors I'm rounding with...they are the best..so, knowledgeable and great teachers...Today, I had a heart to heart with my attending and she really helped me sort out some deciding factors...I think I'm set on Internal Medicine for now and perhap add on emergency medicine specialty at a later date. I must keep my options open and with IM background...I can virtually go any where and my longevity is not a factor... So, the scriptures says in Job 23:10 NKJV, "But, He knows the way that I take; when He has tested me, I shall come forth as pure gold." I am in my season of refinement and looking forward to me season of reaping.... Turning points...Trust your instinct...Trust your Maker...Trust your future is BRIGHT! Now, go live your dreams!

Can we dance?

I remember there was a time when I could play the corporate game.  I could overlook the small bothersome things in the work place and keep moving.  I could excel in my job, get promoted and recognized for outstanding performance and careless about the politics of the office.  BUT, NOW what has happened to that career woman.  Have I forgotten how to dance?  Have I forgotten or am I just not into dancing in that manner anymore? 

It has been such a long time since I had to do the corporate dance...that I have completely forgotten if it's a two step or a waltz.  Prior to embarking on this journey, I was self employed for 12 years.  I set the pace, I chose the dance.  And I always prefered and upbeat tempo with a whole lot of soul.  So, now that I am at the lower end of the totem pole...my moves have been stunned.  This is when the self evaluation and humbleness has to kick in.   I'm just not use to people loud talking me, spies in office watching your every move.  This is ludacris.  But, it's only temporary.  I am going to make it through this last week and half and it's back to the hospital....

I am now assigned to a small outpatient internal medicine office.  The doctor I am working with has been practicing medicine over 40 years and has a real on hands approach to everything in the office, even who is making copies...Yes, copies...Her bedside manner is quite different than my style, but most of her patients has been with her for many, many years and they continue to come back for more.  She's a type of hold no punches, in your face type.....she and the patients go back and forth in heated dialogue....but, one thing I found...They all come back.  At first, I wasn't quite sure how to handle her approach...but, one thing I did see was she was like this with everyone. 

So, I had to realize this is her way, her personality and I must not take her out burst to heart, but see the true intent and that is she does care for her patients.  I must say, I admire her ability to assess and diagnose quickly.  She is concerned about the whole patient: preventative care, acute, and chronic management.  When she is in a calm mood, she is a fabulous teacher.  This week I had to stop taking offense at her style and embrace her sincerity.  She means well.  She's a bit perculiar, but she a great practioner. 

I must learn to dance again...I must recognize there are many different types of music and I will be limiting my experience if I cannot come to appreciate music of all genres....

So, you may be faced with some static, noise or unfamiliar music that has become distracting and is only bringing you frustration, try to see beyond the distraction and get the message or the lesson being taught.

Humble yourself and in due season, you will be exalted. 1 Peter 5:6

Now, go live your dreams!

What are you made of?

It's been three weeks in I'm in the thick of things in my Emergency Room rotation...Yes, ER...It is part of our internal medicine rotation...I am so happy to have this opportunity.  I give Thanks and Honor to GOD for allowing me to live out this dream.  It is so exciting.  I started in the ER a couple of weeks ago, not really knowing what to expect, except what I've attentively watched on one of my favorite shows, "Untold stories of the ER."  Well, being in the middle of it all, is a totally different story.

I've never really had much experience in the hospital setting, (for those of you that do not know my background, I'm was a mortgage broker prior to pursuing my dream.)  I did some volunteer work on a hospital ward, but mostly in a clinic setting.  So, actually being a student doctor in a hosptial is a whole different story.  So, my first day reporting to the ER was so exciting and I found out what I was really made of....CHICKEN. ...LOL...

I have never been so nervous in all my days...as soon as I get there....guess what? A CODE was in route from Emergery Rescue Team....I was terrified. ...I was told, "get in there doc help out"...I thought I was going to pass out...my mind went totally blank...I was horrified....a nurse asked me to place a pulse oximeter on the patient finger and I freaked out...I couldn't do it.  Thank GOD I was with a more seasoned 4th year med student that showed me what the nurse was asking...basically it was like putting on a band-aid...LOL....That day I will never forget...The day I perhaps fell in love with ER medicine....

In such a fast pace setting at times, you have to be able to think quickly and with confidence.  I had to draw on my confidence knowing that I am there to learn and the attending physicians are there to assist and guide me.  My confidence meter was on very low, needed to be recharged, refilled, re-ignited.  So, I did what I normally do in cases like this...I went inward, prayed upward, sought wise counsel from those that truly believe in me and the next week, I was ready to move forward in confidence. 

My second week came quickly.  Not sure that I was performing well or to my standards, I shook off last week and pushed forward to a better second week.  One thing I found, there is no time for pity parties, you have to shake off , go home and study what you  did not remember that day and move forward to the next day..For tomorrow holds worries of it's own.. Matth 6:34....

As soon as I get in to the ER, a patient with respiratory failure  arrives via EMS and is not ventilating...I began interviewing the husband and trying to get the story and I heard the doctor say we have to intubate her.  I was terrified...The doctor ask who patient is this?  Of course, she was mine.  So, guess what, I had to intubate her...The doctor with a patient but blunt way began to quiz me on the spot on the procedures of intubation, sedation, etc, etc...With the best support team and fellow colleagues, a successful intubation was accomplished. 

Now, I so want to learn everything I can to be the best ER doctor, but I still have such a long way to go.  I'm still building my tolerance at the sight of blood or anything else gross..I saw with my own eyes some nauseating stuff .....my stomach was so upset my first week...I couldn't stand very much.  I was so embarassed.....But, I made it thru my shifts....and now I'm in my last week...

Although it's early in my clinical rotations and where I finally decided to plant my roots, only GOD knows; this I know I am enjoying the ride.  And with all jokes I know what I'm made of: perservance, dedication, tenacity, excitement, resilience, strength, faithfulness, wisdom, peace, righteousness, meekness, and humbleness.  As we use to say as kids, "sugar and spice and everything nice...that's what girls are made of!"

What are you made of?  Are you doing all you know and/or can do to live out your desires in this life?  Because what you truly believe you are made of ....WILL manifest in your surroundings, in your attitude, in your LIFE...

Now, go live YOUR LIFE like you only have ONE!

Nothing is Impossible...

Okay, I know it's been a long time since my last post...please forgive me...
Things are going well....I PASSED STEP 1....YAY!.....and now I am in my 4th week of my Family medicine rotation.  It is a totally different world on this side of Step 1...LOL...

Although Step 1 was extremely challenging and I prayed earnestly to pass, I kinda feel like a fish out of water.  I think I had gotten use to the struggle, the uneasy feeling of the unknown...that had become my norm.  Now, on this side of Step 1 is a whole new world I must get use to.  I'm stepping into the real world of practicing medicine.  It's time to put into practice the knowledge I've obtained. 

In Family Medicine, we see patients from ages 7 to 100+. I have yet to see any children, though. Most of our patients are elderly.  The office I'm working in is a very fast pace office with no breaks...OMG...from the time we hit the floor, we are moving and going non-stop. It's amazing how my attendings are so sharp and knowledgeble.  They are able to recall and apply needed information to care for the patients.   They all are very helpful, too. 

The first week was absolutely torture on my feet...one night leaving the office I had to walk on the grass because the sidewalk was just to hard and the pain was excruciating.  So, I just had to leave my dress shoe at home and start wearing my tennis shoes.  Now, I have no issues standing all day....

Incorporating days at the office and nights studying for shelf exams, took me a little time to get the swing of; but, I think I have my schedule down now.  September 20th, I take my first shelf exam for Family Medicine.....(I know the testing never ends)....Then I start my Internal Medicine rotation...
Isn't this exciting?  Remember when I was just trying to make it through organic chemistry...LOL...That goes to show you, if you don't give up, you can and will make it to your goal....

As I reflect back to the beginning of this journey, having to go back to school after being out for over 12yrs, taking all the prerequisites plus the highly recommended courses, tending to my children and terminally ill husband, all I can say is "NOTHING IS IMPOSSIBLE TO THOSE THAT BELIEVE."

Now, go live your dream!

Waiting in Faith...

This morning I woke up concerned about my performance on Step 1.  As I have been going back over questions that were lingering in my head, it seems that most of the questions had two part answers to them...And, I'm not sure if I answer both parts of the questions...I know I got the first part correctly but the second part..not so sure.....My deepest desire, prayer, wish, hope is that I answered enough questions correctly to move to the next step on this journey.....Hospital Clinical Rotations....

I have a great support system and so many people believe in me...which is priceless.  But, it's kinda irritating to hear so many people arbitrarily say, "You got this."  "You did fine." "No need to worry."  I know they are being supportive.  But, the truth is I don't know that I "got this", I don't know if "I performed well"..That exam was the hardest exam, I've ever taken.  I must stand in Faith knowing GOD knows that way that I take and He will delight in my way.  This is the time in life when I must push out every self doubt, and believe GOD is with me.  He is leading me and guiding me into all truth.  I have been destined for this path and no exam can deter me.  I will conquer this step in my journey and I will continue on to complete that which I set out to do.  Although, the exam was heart retching and heart breaking...I must believe it is all working for my good.  I have made it through many twist and turns on the path and each time GOD has seen my through successfully.  I have to wait in FAITH...knowing my ending shall be greater than my beginning.  I am walking out my dream.  I am on the path that I always wanted and now...I must continue on in FAITH...

Although my abilities, may seem very limiting to me at this time, I know the GOD that I serve FAVOR is for a life time.  He will shine on me like the noon day and all that I put my hands to do will succeed!

There were definitely gaps in my knowledge and this is the part that is scary.  For instance, I knew that taking Vitamin C with iron supplements increase absorption of the iron; however, I did not know the mechanism of action of Vitamin C on iron.  Missing that last step in the concept, caused me to choose the wrong answer.  If I had time to reason it out, I would I choose the correct answer.  Iron must be in the reduced state in the human body (Fe 2+) and Vitamin C helps iron stay in it's reduced form...WOW, I knew that...I pray this question doesn't haunt me for the rest of my medical career....I heard some of my professor talk about questions that have haunted them their whole career from their first licensing exams..So, perhaps this is a part of human nature, to go over and over in your head questions missed.  Well, I would say I will never miss that question again...

So, as I wait on my scores....I'm doing everything in my conscious and subconscious mind to think positive thoughts..Picturing myself receiving good news.  Opening my results and seeing "CONGRATULATIONS, You PASSED USMLE STEP 1!"

Stay in Faith...Follow your dreams!
Selah

I did it - Step 1 COMPLETED!

So many emotions are running through my mind and body right now....I have been up 21 hours now....too excited to sleep...too tired to go to bed...I've been going through First Aid for the past few hours trying to look up questions from my exam...and that alone is exhausting...I'm hoping and praying that I did better than how I felt taking the exam...

I finished the exam at 4:30pm today and as I was walking out the office into the main lobby of the building, the young lady that was sitting next to me was crying her eyes out.  She couldn't understand why "they" made the exam so difficult. "We put so much time, energy and sacrifice into studying for this exam (some up to 6 mos), and they take it all away in one day." At that point, I couldn't help but forget about my horrible experience and I sat down to console her....Nothing is in vain, every disappointment is a stepping stone for a greater victory.....So, stand tall you made it to the other side. It was perhaps the most challenging curriculum on earth and you are half way done....Now, after sitting there with her one hour....Both of our hearts and souls were purged...I may never see her again in life...but little does she know...she helped me get outside the obvious and stay in faith knowing GOD has not brought me this far to leave me.....Selah

No matter what it looks like I am choosing to stand in faith and believe GOD will open doors that no man can close...Job 23:10, "He knows that way that I take; when He has tested me I shall come forth as pure gold.."

Now, go live your dreams....It is possible...!

All things in time...

As I am diligently studying for Step 1, I cannot help but be excited for such a wonderful life.  I decided to take my time and sit for the exam on the 25th of this month...just 5 days shy of my deadline...It would have been nice to have done it early...but, I needed time off....I just could not get into my "GO HARD" study mode that I have been in for so long...I am now pumping up my intensity and I am feeling more confident each day....

I have come to learn that all things will come together in time...No need to worry..Just prepare! Prepare for what you desire...Prepare for the open doors that are set before you...Prepare for GOD's Divine  providence to manifest in your life with the spirit of excellence...You first must believe that you will see the goodness of the Lord in the land of the living....Psalm 27:13....All things in time..Selah!

Now, go live  your dreams....

Time is ticking....

Tick...Tock...Tick...Tock....
No matter how much I desired to be in this space in time, I am so anxious to get this over and done with...I have successfully completed another semester of the most challenging task of my life..and now, It's time to put into action all the wonderful things I've learned of the past two years....But, for some reason, I would like time to stand still.  Or I would love if there was a way to get out of taking this USMLE Step exam....Why do I feel this way?  Why am I so anxious and nervous about this exam....?  Could it be that I know on the other side of it is the key that unlocks my life's mysteries?  Could it be that my time has come and I'm about to get everything that I have been blogging about?  Could it be just false evidence appearing real?  Well, whatever the reason, I feel like I do...There's one thing I know...I will overcome it and conqueror it...I will push through and get everything I've worked so hard for...I was born for this time and this space...I was destined to see this day!

So, no matter what I am feeling, if it is contrary to what I desire, I must push it out of my head and focus on what I want and where I want to go...I can do this...I will do this...I have everything working in my favor and all I have to do is to continue doing what I've been doing.  Applying myself, preparing myself...and move forward...

From the beginning of this journey, I longed for this time. I could not wait to get through the class room time and the opportunity to get into the hospitals...Well, I'm here..and I am most anxious about this Step 1 exam....If only there was a way for me to get past this phase and on to the next.  I'm here at the door..the door that allows me to cross over to my dream...and I'm stumbling.....So, I have to get a grip, because TIME is TICKING....I have until June 30th to take the exam....but, what a waste of time if I continue to linger..I could take this exam next month and have the whole summer off and enjoy myself...if I procrastinate til June 30th, I will only prolong the inevitable....

So, as time continues to tick for me...pray for me....I am so over this studying stuff...LOL...
Philippians 3:12-13
Press on Toward the Goal
12Not that I have already obtained it or have already become perfect, but I press on so that I may lay hold of that for which also I was laid hold of by Christ Jesus. 13Brethren, I do not regard myself as having laid hold of it yet; but one thing I do: forgetting what lies behind and reaching forward to what lies ahead,…

Now, go live your dream!

Rethinking My plan...

With much contemplation and consideration, I have decided to push Step 1 til end of May  or early June...I have been so busy with this semester...I am putting in 16 hr days and do not feel I am mastering what I need to master this semester...There are so many clinical tasks that I have to know and will be test on that I can not afford to forgo this semester trying to reach into the future....Coming into This Advanced Introduction to Clinical Medicine semester, we were told that studying for Step 1 would be a huge challenge and it is not recommended.  But, I thought I could do it...I want to do it...I need to do it....Well, Step 1 is the most important exam I will ever take in my Medical career..It is the score that will get me through the door...So, I can't count my chickens before they hatch....Right? So, I am going to slow my roll and pace myself to make sure I master the concepts I need to do exceptionally well on the exam....Step 1 exam can not be rushed....So, first things first....Finish this semester strong...

I have put all my energies into studying for Step, now I have to play catch up with my assignments that are in front of me....I have a physical exam competency (165 things to do within 45 mins) hoovering over me, a final OSCE exam (Observed Structured Clinical Exam), and my comprehensive final written exam...Not to mention class time....So, I better switch gears.....I just had my midterm on Monday and I believe it went well...I have not received the results yet....

Back in December, I said I was going to study diligently over Christmas break and take Step before this semester started..Well, the studying diligently part did not happen...LOL....I missed my window of taking Step before this semester started....As a wise saying goes."Nothing before the time."  Although I want to start this new assignment on May 19th...It's not going to happen....I am going to trust that I'm on schedule, in the right place and all things are working for my good....I know that my steps are ordered by GOD....

Psalm 37:23-25, NKJ "The steps of a good man is ordered by God, and he delights in his way...Though he fall, he shall not utterly be cast down: for the Lord uphold him with His Hand...I've been young and now I am old; yet, I have not seen the righteous forsaken nor his seed begging for bread."

So, with that said.....Rethinking your plan can be frustrating at times, trying to make sure all the pieces of the puzzles fit, but this we all should keep in mind,  that the Universe is filled with opportunities and filled with provision...Your future is bright...There is greatness in your future....So, if by chance a curve has been thrown into your plans...fear not...there is another way.  The Universe is so dynamic and has unlimited options and resources available to you, if only you open your eyes to see.  

The limits and constrains we impose on ourselves are sometimes unfair to the cultivation of the splendor that resides within...So, let's plan our future with great expectations, but when the plan need rearranging, fear not...this is yet another opportunity to see the splendor of GOD's work manifesting in your life...Selah

It's the first day of SPRING! Enjoy the day!

Now, go live your dream!

Feeling the Fire....

Okay, after 12 hours of studying yesterday, I am feeling the fire..."I"m on one."  I am in my study groove...Thank you Lord....It took me a while to get back in this groove since I made it back to the US...I guess over the past two years I equated coming home to the US as vacation time.  And now that I have a set time to take Step 1, I had to get my focus back....

I had some very exciting news that motivated me even more.  I applied to start a clinical rotation track. Thinking there might be a small chance that I would get the track due to the fact that I didn't have my Step 1 score and I know it is a really competitive track to get into, I applied anyway, just to see what happens...it was a track I had my eye on from day one and was so glad to finally be at this point to have the chance to get in...Well, our clinical adviser said it may be hard to get into  it, since I did not have 5th semester completed and getting all paperwork completed and submitted would be a challenge, etc, etc, etc....and guess what???  I got the track...OMG!  I didn't know whether to celebrate or cry....I felt more like crying because knew I had to get serious about studying and now I'm in a huge time crunch.  According to my acceptance letter, I must sit for Step 1 by April 4th....Oh no!

I had already resolved in my mind that I was going to relax this semester and casually study (in medical school causally studying means at least 4hrs after class..LOL) and then crank up my studying (12 + hrs/day) April and May and sit for Step no later than June 15th....Well, that has all changed...my schedule exam day is April 3rd.....I have to make huge leaps and bounds by then....

So, what does all this mean for me?  I have to juggle a million things at once.  According to our program directors, they do not recommend us trying to study for Step 1 during this semester because there are so many clinical things we have to learn....So, I am juggling my obligations to this semester and then studying til 2 am or so.....Right, now I'm running on adrenaline..I just pray it keeps me going til April 3rd...

I'm feeling the fire.  I am in my zone....I have to make this happen.  Step 1 is the most important exam a medical student can take...It is the first thing that is looked when applying for residency.  So, I have to hit a home run..I have to score high enough...What's high enough?  Enough to get the residency I want...No one can really say what enough is but I need the score that will get me through the doors I wish to walk through...There are statistics out there on average scores....But, I've never focused too much on those. Because I know I have GOD on my side..... But, I sure do not want to fall below them...I know with determination and persistence, I will get where I want to be, where I'm suppose to be.....But, I have to do my part and prepare for it..So, I will score my best...I will be prepared.  And if not...I will decline the track...and take the time I need...There will be more opportunities...But, who knows when they will come along, again...That's why it is so important to prepare NOW and seize the opportunity in front of me.  So, with that said...PRAY FOR ME, PLEASE...!!!

It's Not Over.....

Have you ever felt like you were down to your last?  You started out strong, but somewhere in the middle you started to fizz out....You started with great intentions but it all seem like the dream is so far away...Well, today, I'm here to say..."IT IS NOT OVER..unless you give up!"

Last night I was out with some classmates bowling...and all night I was rolling gutter balls....It seemed I just could not get my bowling arm together....I hit a lot of gutter balls...my hands were getting tired...but, in the last game of the night........I made great efforts to bowl my best game....I approached the bowling area and took my time, paid close attention to how I was swinging my arm, how fast I was rushing to throw the ball....and this time I got a strike on first throw..then on the second throw same thing....My enthusiasm was flowing and I was on my way to a TURKEY (3 strikes in row)....Well, it didn't happen...My hand started hurting...I was reverting back to my old ways....but, I kept telling myself...I can win this game...Then I got another gutter ball....Well, I still had the lead...so, I reverted back to my visualizing my every step...I improved and was able to maintain the lead...and the maintaining allowed my competitors to gain ground on me....So, here we are at the last frame of the game and my hand is tired and I need all strikes to win the game....and to my surprise I did it..I rolled 3 strikes in a row...It was truly amazing....I know this was such an insignificant feat in the scale of real life but there's a story of triumphant, visualization and perseverance in it....

Sometime the road ahead will have some smooth parts when all things are coming together nicely...then there may be days when it look like all things are falling apart....but, if you do not give up...your ending will be all that you ever imagined...

So, PUSH when it's time..Rest when it's needed...But, whatever you do NEVER, NEVER GIVE UP!

I just had the privilege to witness a beautiful testimony of one of my classmates that continues to bring tears to my eye and joy in my heart because she never gave up.  She pushed after many failed attempts at passing the COMP...She sought out wise council...She rested...Boy, was she tested....But, She continued to follow her dream and on this same day that I rolled 3 strikes in a row...she PASSED her STEP 1 exam....

GOD shows up for us ALL...He has no respect of person...

Now, go live your dream...

It's a NEW DAY!

As I anxiously got dressed this morning, I realized how things have changed for me.  I am no longer on the beautiful island of Dominica, attempting to beat the clock with watching my lectures for the day.  I am no longer walking everywhere I have to go.  I am no longer rushing to a class or a Integrated Clinical Groups, but I am driving.  I'm driving to campus to study for my STEP 1 exam...It's a new day!....

I decided to slow down, take some time off and enjoy life, my sons, mom, friends, etc.  Although, I'm not meeting my Feb 2014 Step 1 exam dateline I set last year, more importantly...I found my peace.  I'm at peace with where I am right now in this process.  I'm at peace with the fact that I have successfully complete my Basic Sciences and now, I am embarking onto the next phase of my medical school career....Clinical Clerkships.....And what better place to begin a new task, than in Miami, FL....

I'm now in the beautiful area of Miami, FL...and it is absolutely lovely.  The atmosphere is fantastic and just puts you in a good mood.  As I was driving to campus this morning to begin my hard core Step 1 studying, I noticed cars rushing by me.  People going about their daily tasks and I could not help but, THANK GOD for where I am right now.  I realized, "It's a NEW DAY for me, a new area for me to grow.....and it feels GOOD!"

"Therefore, judge Nothing before the appointed time.  Wait until the Lord comes.  He will bring to light what is hidden in darkness and will expose the motives of the heart. At that time EACH will receive their praise from GOD".  1 Cor 4:5 NIV

Enjoy your day....though times past may have seemed impossible or you never thought you will see today...STOP and REALIZE....YOU made it...It's A NEW DAY!....Enjoy it....You are on the verge of something bigger than yourself....Live Life!

Now, go live your dreams....

Overwhelmed..

I just finished the first week my Step 1 review course and it blew my mind at the amount of information that I was supposed to have retained...The scriptures says in Song of Solomon 2:15 that, "it's the little foxes that spoil the vines, for our vines have tender grapes,"  meaning that I must pay attention to the details and not let the small things destroy my dreams....I can do it!

I was really concerned about sitting in a class room 8 hrs a day and just going over just one subject. Last week we covered BioChemistry.  I thought it would bore me crazy.  But, I found that the information shared over those hours was much needed, and some what exciting....I can't believe I said that out loud...LOL...At the end of the day I was exhausted.  I did not have the energy to put in 5 more hours of study as suggested.

So, I have to re-think my game plan.  I'm hoping this coming week will be a better week.  I have to figure out a way to get more energy.  Studying here in US requires more time and preparation.  The difference in studying in US vs on Dominica is in Dominica I did not have to commute anywhere..I just rolled out of bed and walked a few steps to my desk and planted myself for the next 12hrs.  But, with taking this course, I have to get up at 6:30 am, get dress and drive 35 min or more to sit in class for 8 hrs, then the drive home is at least 45 mins...by the time I get home it's 6 pm and I'm exhausted.  I tried taking a short nap..but, after that I'm still not into my groove of studying...because, I'm thinking I need to get to sleep early so I can feel rested the next day...So, in actuality I'm only getting 2 hrs on average of review after class, if that much....

Where do I fit my gym time in here?  For the next few weeks we only get 1 day off....So, going 8 hrs a day for 6 days a week and then supposedly putting in 5 hrs after class....How do I do this?  I always say, if there is a will there is a way...I have to figure this out.....This is the time I earnestly seek the WISDOM of GOD...I know I can do all things through Christ that strengthens me.  I will figure this out...I will come out on top....As the Carrie Underwood song says, "Jesus take the wheel," I need direction....

Happy NEW Years...2014....Love Myself More....

How did you spend your New Years Eve?   Did you spend it with family? friends?  Did you go to a swinging party?  Did you stay in and watch the crystal ball drop in NYC?  No matter how you spent your evening, I pray that you were at peace.  I pray that you were whole.  I pray that your expectations for the NEW YEAR was at its all time high!

Now, Take that positive energy, that excitement about 2014 and use it to fuel your drive to accomplish your desires this year.  CHANGE your world this year! Accomplish something that you have always dreamed of...no matter how BIG or how small...It can be done this year.  With 363 days left in this wonderful year, it can be done...Start today...Start NOW!

Dr. Wayne Dyer posted on FB,  "What if the only resolution you made was to love yourself more?"  For we know that if we truly love ourselves, it will spill over to others.  This is my resolution this year...

How do love myself?  Does it mean that I should become self indulgent? Does it mean I will think of myself first?  Does it mean that I serve my needs above others?  I don't think so...To love myself more this year, would be to take better care of ME, not just the outward person, most importantly, the inward spirit that I really am.

We are all Spirit that dwell in flesh.  In order for our BEING to be WHOLE, we must love, cater to and nourish the SPIRIT within.  The things that I embody within are the things that I will manifest in 2014.  I did an exercise last night called, "I AM ____________."  Surprisingly, the list was 2 columns wide and filled the whole page.  One thing I've learned from Dr. Dyer is I must know and say, that "I AM CONNECTED to MY SOURCE at all times."  Knowing this will allow my spirit to grow to the greatness it was created to be.

Each year we are either growing or shrinking.  Each step we take towards our destiny unleashes a positive affirmation within our spirit that can not be denied.  Use that step as fuel this year.  Move forward and you will see walls fall, stumbling blocks removed.

I'm starting this wonderfully Blessed Year, loving myself more...walking in Gratitude and Wholeness.  I am whole.  I am Peace.  I am Well.  I am Prosperous.  I am Happy.  I am Strong.  I am Wisdom.  I am Understanding.  I am a GIVER.  I am Moving Forward....

Now, go live your dream....